Tuesday, April 18, 2006
We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors. we borrow it from out children this is what we were talking about yesterday in assembly
honestly,
before this,
my thinking about the world and about it heating up and eventually causing icebergs to break off and drown the whole world,
was really,
nothing
i felt the world would come to an end anyway so it wasn't wrong to help it along.
but along with the speech and stuff,
a bible verse supported everything.
like, basically God had put us man in charge of this world.
i figured that this world isn't ours,
it's HIS.
we ought to return it to him just like,
or even better than when he put us in charge over it.
we were given responsibility for every single living creature and we should look after every creature as well as this world we're stuck on right now.
everyone start using Lampe Burger instead of candles!
oh yes,
my phone got stolen yesterday as well as Calista's which ann na had given to me to look after.
but in the end my phone was found
in the toilet according to my mom?
i guess it was too old and redundant to be kept
anyway,
today was nice.
no math.
chatted with doralynn for that period
cup noodle party at Vick's after school while watching Scary Movie 2.
i swear i've never watched anything more stupid
had gone shopping with vicky at ntuc after school.
it was bloody effing funny
the damned umbrella kept suddenly POPPING open
oh gawd.
haha
and we were falling all over the place laughing
and we wanted to ram the trolley into people's butts.
i swear,
being with vicky really makes you laugh so much you pee in your undies.
lovely lovely day all in all
oh yes,
it was ruined.
i don't like being hated for no apparent reason
i absolutely can't stand it
i'm okay if im hated or not liked because,
well just because or because someone doesn't like how i look.
anything's better than, apparently,
no reason.
and i think it's stupid if a friend demands to know when where and how you got a girlfriend/boyfriend
and then gets upset when she feels she's the last to find out and claims the whole school knows and actually implies that maybe it's because i've been handing out information about my love life like they're free condoms or some fucking shit
upon her getting mad at the friend who didn't give her immediate updates on his love life, she blames me.
oh yes,
it's all my fault.
and well,
i thought that was unfair because i thought she was a really nice sweet pretty girl.
believe it or not,
i smiled in her direction whenever i saw her,
i wasn't a bitch in any way
and you know what?
apparently her distaste of me "has been from the very beginning"
okay,
talking about it gets me worked up all over again.
so shut up charis,
shut up.
besides,
i'll be bitching about it anyway.
and i wouldn't want that girl to end up getting hurt.
dear friends, you don't really have to ask what's going on. you probably don't understand.
i'll tell you(:
a girl needs to bitch to vent.
oh yes.
i don't like CC
and she knows it.
and today i told her to shutup.
haha
funny,
the two above girls mentioned are in the same cca
okay,whatever
it's crucial i go to school on thursday.
and i've got stuff on tomorrow of great importance too.
after school stuff,
so.
WOW
maybe this'll be my first week where i'm in school
ALL FIVE DAYS(:
wheeeee
TO MY DEAREST DARLINGEST BABY BUUUUU:
THANK YOU THANK YOU THAAAAANK YOU FOR THAT GORGEOUS GORGEOUS GORGEOUS MIRROR YOU GAVE ME!
I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT
AND I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!
yes, i am definitly honoured to have as a present to me, my baby buu's very FIRST 3d artwork(:
<3
i'm gonna eat an apple to destress
- xoxo
charis loves you
9:45 PM
(0) comments
Friday, April 14, 2006
just another word, just another smile
just another feeling, more bitter than bile today was okay
i woke up at 5.15 to switch off my alarm clock for school
haha
dim sum with alastair's family
after which everyone went to raffles city to hang about for a bit
it was okay i guess
so why this particular feeling gnawing away my insides? shopping was good
bought what i needed for bird's present
bought silly stupid accessories for my retro theme tomorrow
i'm excited
i havn't told bird that alastair will probably not be coming
i told him she really didn't mind if you don't go according to theme,
you just have to do the forfeit.
but he doesn't wanna
he told me he probably wouldn't be going
i'm still struggling to find out if it makes sense
okay i'm gonna stop being a bitch and unstop talking to him
because
well it's just dumb if i'm upset with my boyfriend cos he doesn't wanna go to my best friend's party
oh yes, i remember now
it was cos he claimed he didn't really know my friends all that well
which is,
well,
does that make sense?
okay nevermind
i'm tired of figuring guys out
i'm tired of a lot of things
i wanna curl up in bed and go to sleep and not wake up for a long time
someone please tell me what's going on.
all i want, all i ever wanted was something simple and sweet.
i never needed the complications
i never fucking wanted the bloody fucking tears
i thought you were here to take them away
i thought
- xoxo
charis loves you
5:05 PM
(0) comments
there is a bitch in my class who i don't like
but im tired now so i'll whine tomorrow
today was fun
school was boring like everyone seems to be saying
after school was nice
studying's not so bad
okay the person who's pissed me off is annoying
i swear something bad will happen to her if she annoys me again
bitch
i <3 alastair
(:
- xoxo
charis loves you
12:55 AM
(0) comments
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
i fear 3 out of 66 things! [ ] the dark
[ ] staying single
[ ] getting married
[ ] being a parent
[ ] giving birth
[ ] being myself in front of others
[ ] open spaces
[ ] closed spaces
[ ] heights
[ ] cats
[ ] dogs
[ ] birds
[ ] spiders and/or other insects
[ ] driving or being in cars
[ ] flying
[ ] being put to sleep (anesthesia)
[ ] flowers or other plants
[ ] being touched
[ ] fire
[ ] water
[ ] the ocean
[ ] pools
[ ] failure
[ ] success
[ ] germs
[ ] thunder/lightning
[ ] frogs/toads
[ ] mice/rats
[ ] jumping from high places
[ ] snow
[ ] rain
[ ] wind
[ ] cemeteries
[ ] clowns
[ ] large crowds
[ ] demons or evil
[ ] crossing bridges
[ ] death
[ ] Hell
[ ] Heaven
[ ] being robbed
[ ] being sexually assulted
[ ] men
[ ] women
[ ] having great responsibility
[ ] doctors, including dentists
[ ] tornadoes
[ ] hurricanes
[ ] being punished
[ ] diseases, including cancer and STD's
[ ] snakes
[x] sharks
[ ] dinosaurs
[ ] Friday the 13th
[ ] poverty
[ ] ghosts
[ ] Halloween
[ ] school
[ ] trains or railroads
[x] fear
[ ] being alone
[x] losing my friends
[ ] being blind to things
[ ] being deaf
[ ] growing up
[ ] being murdered in my sleep
okayokay
out of point
so so sooo much has happened
that i forgot
haha
lets see
i'm ill today
but i'll be in school tomorrow
akira's Kavadi thing was bloody cool
it looked damn painful,
but it was still cool to watch it
especially up close
and someone i know too!
whee
he had to fast and everything before as well as after so,
i lift my cap to him
not that i wear a cap but that's besides the point
so anyway,
after school yesterday,
went over to Stacy's
i think her animals have this thing against certain smells
her very cute little puppy peed on me and the couch
after which,
val bit and scratched me
because she was scared and all and didn't really like the new arrival
i realize stacy's got lotsa pets
jo and bunnykins came over for dinner last night
last night's dinner was nice(:
im busybusybusy
i have a math test tomorrow
i have to an english practice
i have a chem prac next monday
i am ill and blur
i have to redo bird's birthday present
AND i have to take it to the shop and get it done ASAP
i am ill and blur
and i have to get the final thing i need to complete bird's birthday present
and i am ill and blur
and i realized for some odd reason i keep spelling birthday as
BORTHDAY
haha
i think i'm having a fever
i waaant my mummyyyyy
today was nice(:
it was very nice
but i still feel ill
i've got stretch marks that itch
ew
i need to lose weight
i'm going to try not to say a word for 24 hours sometime soon
because
well because when you shut up,
you hear a lot more
there's a bitch or two i have to deal with everyday
but then
that's life isn't it?
i've got essential oils for my aromatherapy smell in my very nice smelling room
wheeee
they smell very nice
i love i love i love
i'm sick
mummyyyyyyI SAY ELLIE YOU SAY STARE
ELLIE
stare!
ELLIE
stare!elliestare
whee
haha
okay nevermind
i miss alastoooooore
he's on a daaaateee
without meeeee
i blame my whiny-ness on me being sick
i love you,
i love you more than you can ever imagine
and i always will
i do stuff sometimes,
all in the name of venting or destressing,
stuff that might hurt you
and make you think that you don't matter at all to me
stuff that might make you feel this relationship doesn't mean anything
but it's not true,
really it's not.
leave,
if you'll be happier
but still,
i'll keep on loving you
- xoxo
charis loves you
6:20 PM
(0) comments
Sunday, April 09, 2006
you were pissed off with something that had just happened and you took it out on me. got all upset with me cos i behaved like i wasn't listening when i fucking was. then saying the day wasn't all that bril today actually wasn't that bad til just now
well it's really not that bad anymore to be honest because he vented a bit then went for dinner.
dinner dinner dinner(:
mummy's coming home and bringing dinner with her!
and OOOOOOH
DURIANS
<3
so anyway,
today was nice,short and sweet.
literally
5 hours is equivilant to about 2 minutes
so an hour would beeeeee
hmmmm
baby went on to enjoy his funfilled, action-packed day which in the end turned out to be a one-on-one date with Ben. haha.
his poor friend Germaine probably felt uncomfortable with them being all so lovey-dovey.
tsktsk
haha
anyway,
yesterday was okay
yeaa i was depressed,
and everything just made me more depressed like
oh i don't know how to put it
the esplanade and the walking around eating subway cookies was funfunfun(:
thinking about it now i'm smiling to myself like some idiot
but yes,
it was fun
i absolutely loved it even though i didn't really show it yesterday,
and i'm sorry for that.
after church was roomful of blues
oh it was LOVELY
hilbert played and sang at about 11.30
he's a friend of my mom's and uncle adam's
i knew his voice and guitar playing was amazing
but last night
wow
i saw a different side of AMAZING
haha
victor was there too
you could tell he was enjoying himself
i love seeing victor like that!
haha
singing to himself
super cute
pushed bunnykins up to play on the drums
he claimed he sucked and it was super hard
well,
it sounded hard but he definitely didn't suck(:
home after that
Alpha camp was super super fun(:
i promised myself i'd try everything except flying fox
just cos i didn't wanna try flying fox cos i just don't wanna
anyway
i rock-climbed and reached the top!
wheee
YAY FOR ME
i think i accomplished all i wanted to
okay, day ruined
pretty much anyway
i don't wanna talk about it here
okay, besides the point
BABY!
you didn't tell your mummy where you were and she's all worried!
tsk
i hope you'll read this,
i don't know if you still read my blog and stuff
but i do hope you'll read this
you're not an ant,
you're not a passerby in my life
knowing you helped me in ways i probably don't even know yet
you're special
to me and to many more people than you probably even realize
you're not an ant,
remember that.
you're not just another person
and all i can say is that,
for someone who cares as much as you do,
you're certainly okay with me being hurt.
because it hurts more and more everytime you push me away like this
it really does
strange how guys make girls cry so easily
- xoxo
charis loves you
8:25 PM
(0) comments
Saturday, April 08, 2006
and all i can do,
is sit here and crytoday was a pretty good day,
as was yesterday,
and the day before.
i had so much i wanted to blog about,
i was so so so happy.
i was gonna type out stupid lyrics like
"we were sad when the big ship sank down to the bottom"
haha
but i can't
not right now,
because from yesterday's,
from up til today's ultimate high,
i started sliding down.
that's okay
i was sliding back down to normality again
but then alastair's all upset about something or another and gonna slip into depression.
guess what,
i crashed into it myself
i received a letter.
mummy just passed it to me
and that letter,
i had hopes.
i opened it,
not overly excited in any way
i had high hopes.
i didn't think there'd be anything else after all i'd given them.
i opened the letter
and i read it
and i stared
and i read it
and i didn't want to believe it.
i didn't fucking wanna believe it.
but i have to,
because it's a damned fucking legal document
oh we i was sad.
so sad and that's an understatement
- xoxo
charis loves you
12:03 AM
(0) comments
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
friday's party was veryvery fun
and so was michelle and hannah's party the following night.
okay i got pretty drunk and puked for the first time ever
BUT
i had fun
really
even though i lost a t shirt and my favourite hairclip which holds my hair in place the best.
dammit
today was really really fun too
which, by the way,
is the reason i'm staying up so late.
to finish the damned presentation i'll be doing in a few hours time
actually i can't say i stayed up.
though i really wish i did,
then i'd be able to go to sleep
instead, i decided to do my math first
i didn't get past refreshing my memory on the first two questions outta five
then i "rested my eyes" for like what, 2 or was it 3 hours? my goodness.
badbad charis
i've done my ic!
wheeee
i don't look that fab in it
and im pretty fucking pissed with the anoying people who kept telling me my hair wasn't allowed could i please look neater.
bleh
i miss alastoooooore:(
i really have to get back to work.
i have to leave for school in 45 mins!
- xoxo
charis loves you
5:10 AM
(0) comments
peeeeektooores!(: