with |ove; me

Monday, February 12, 2007

To alarming now to talk it out
Take your pictures down, shake it out
Truth or consequence, say it aloud
And use that evidence, and race it around

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary

Don't the best of them
Bleed it out
While the rest of them
Peter out
Truth or consequence, say it aloud
And use that evidence, and race it around

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary

There goes my hero
Leaving all the place
You know my hero
The one thats

There goes my hero
Watch him as he goes
There goes my hero
He's ordinary

but oh aren't we all human, and you're still perfect in every way
to me you are,
i swear

she's a girl i thought i knew
but believe me, how people can be ohsodifferent
just 'nother one of them poseurs,
just 'nother one of them wannabes

i know, i know,
who i am to judge,
and pass these words over her?
if you were in my position,
you'd say the same thing

friend?
i think not
i don't know you at all

and you're the fake person i thought you to be when i first knew you
perhaps first time impressions are right after all.

the irony of this is that,
the two cases which made me realize this side of her,
the two people who it directly concerned are completely over it
more or less anyway and i can't say for sure

yes,
i am annoyed
so so annoyed
like pent up fumes inside me
and i look her and feel like telling her to her face how many of us are just so damn fucking tired of her facade
and i'm thinking
fucking show me who you are because i thought i knew you
i thought i did

and you know,
i don't even understand this annoyance or anger inside me
after all,
it's nothing that has exactly been personally yet

still,
i can feel her changed, distant attitude towards me
and i miss her
gawd i miss her so fucking much because
im remembering the time she'd come over for dinner
and the endless laughs we'd have

when did she become this person?
do people change as much as this when they hit sec 3?
do they go through that need to fit in stage like in sec1?

gawd i miss my level.

can't wait for valentine's day
and if you're my friend,
you oughta look forward to it too=D

i need to do prissy's book review.
whoopeedoo
what oh what ought i to dooo?

my endless love
there goes my hero,he's ordinary
but oh i love him more cos of that

- xoxo
charis loves you
10:30 PM

Comments:

HAHA YES MARCUS SUCK & WE ROCK
WOOHOOOOO!!!
: D

<3

# posted by

Unknown : 8:35:00 PM

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only yours baby

i'm charis vera Ng,
i'm NOT a Singaporean, i was born in UK
but i spent most of my four years in scotland
i love alastair(:
i'm doing my best to live for God though i often fail miserably

ok,try this:
you're this girl who's flown over to this country when you're no more than four years of age
you resent your dad for it,
and it doesn't help when things between your parents don't work out either.

so you miss your home terribly,
you miss going strawberry-picking,
you miss eating boiled eggs out of egg-cups
and you miss warm and cuddly Uncle John and Aunty Esther.

instead,
you find yourself forced to change
and adapt in a horribly hot place
where in primary school,
you meet cold,heartless little kids who ignore you and don't let you play "family"
just cos your accent is different.
early on,
you get weird looks and you find yourself going for recess breaks alone.
your classmates complain to the class teacher when you call them stupid
because they don't understand what to you is simple english.
but they leave you alone when you call them an imbecile
because they don't know what it means.
your primary 1 & 2 class teacher takes joy in complaining to your mummy
because she detests you.
she detests you for constantly correcting her english grammer and pronunciation in front of the class
you soon realize that you can actually gain and keep friends upon them finding out your mother's an actress
but by that time you've more or less forced yourself to lose your accent which makes communication a lot easier anyway.

that was the little girl charis,
now,
on top of that,
i can be a total biotch sometimes, towards people.
and don't tell me you aren't sometimes please.
but i try my very best not to bitch about people.
im a dangerous shopper(=
i never know what i want or need til i see it.

i don't like television.
now that's a first innit?HAH.
bet you never knew someone who didn't like tv
well i don't
and i'm not trying to be different and difficult
it's noisy and boring
i like music:)
i find eating a chore but i love snacking
figure that out
i find certain kinds of pain addictive,
no, i promise i'm still sane.

which is actually pretty remarkable for someone living here,
in this time and place
where you normally get loads of homework,
tests with questions that look like they're in foreign language,
and where everything's a competition to be the best,
the prettiest,
the most popular,
the most hated,
the thinnest,
the fattest, the coolest
the list goes on.
one shouldn't try to be something you're not,
but everyone knows that's easier said than done.
like duurh.