with |ove; me

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

too hot too hot too hot

so yes, if you're about to ask, so far it has been sort of a day wasted.

well, until tonight anyway.

English is coming along great. i really need to change my very monotonous sentence structures.

most of my sentences start with a subject or a verb.

i'll highlight that, and change that to make my essays more interesting.

Dawn's a good english teacher. government schools need teachers like her.

so there's this mom who's blog i chanced upon.

she's got three ex husbands, one ex wife, two kids, two cats, two fish, a dog and a boyfriend.

This boyfriend was married with a five year old.

no, i won't say anything.

so this is me, not saying anything.

coming from a family where daddy doesn't live in the same house

(no you dopes! just because divorce is common doesn't mean it's fucking okayy!)

i mean, okay, so she's got a good relationship with her kids' father,

but please!

so what if you know his wife can never have sex with him and give him pleasure the way you do?

so what if we all(even i, as a reader) hate her, the superwoman because she really is such a horrid selfish brat?

so what?

the point is, do we really need any more broken families?

and you're freaking having sex with this guy, two minutes after you've tucked your children in

as well as right after cell group.

no,

i am not holy moley. i do wrong things too.

i'm as human as the rest of the world.

we cheat, get addicted to sex(or something like that)

and hurt the people we love the most.

i've hurt mommy, i've hurt alastair, i've hurt my baby sister!

but one thing i don't do,

is go to cell group, talk about going to church, play a good mommy and call myself a cockwhore.

i don't know how mothers could do that really.

i mean,

i'd just DIE if i saw my mother's naked pictures all over a blog she would probably keep secret from me.

yes, cumshots and all.

on top of that, being so in love with God as my mother is,

i don't think she'd really call herself a cockwhore, flash her boobs and cunt for the world and sleep around.

oh yes, AND tell the world about it.

okay, after this particularly self-righteous, bitchy post,

i do think it's awfully hard to be a mom.

it really is.

can you imagine it?

"hey! wanna have sex with a random hot guy?"

"i can't, G has a ballet recital and tomorrow morning's D's ball game.

i also have work i brought home, not to mention the cat litter which often forgets to clear its contents and walk itself to the rubbish bin"

*usually, instead of this whole long chunk, it would be:

"i can't. i'm a mom"

men, on the other hand,

have it easy(except from their wives of course)

Before kids, they go out anytime they like,

after kids, they go out anytime they like.

if they don't go out, they're just slobbing around in front of the tv anyway.

i'm just saying in general you know?

i know my dad doesn't do that, he's too caught up in his work.

and alastair doesn't do that either, he slobs around if front of the computer,

and i have a gut feeling he'll be doing that if we end up married, with five screaming kids

you know i love you alastair!

but anyway, do you get the point?

even though we'd think it gross if we saw our dad's naked body splattered all over the web,

we'd think it's just that, gross and nothing more.

on top of that, unless we've actually seen that part of our dad's bodies we wouldn't even KNOW it's our dads.

WHICH IS PRECISELY MY POINT!

we wouldn't even be able to tell if the naked body in the photo couple with the erotic blogging is or is not that of our fathers.

and even if we did find out it was our dad,

we'd just think it gross and probably stop walking around wrapped in a towel.

BUT

if it's our mothers we saw

we'd recognize them immediately cos usually the woman's face is in full view.

and then,

we'd think that they were such a complete disgrace.

oh the betrayal!

on top of the

EW EW EW screaming in our heads.

even if our moms were like hot(like stacy's mom)

it'd still be gross.

so yes,

even though i spent the first quarter of my post

dissing the woman like alot

(mainly because she goes to church. and has cell group and ass whipping within hours of each other)

my posting made me realize the hugeass burden a mother carries.

it's more than just, my daughter seeing scarrs i have from cutting myself.

mothers are human after all.

and this woman's still in her "i'm gonna die if i don't fuck something quick" stage.

but she is just thirty.

can you imagine, not only being a mother of two, at thirty, but also having three ex husbands and an ex wife?

yes, mothers do have a lot of weight on their shoulders.

it's still upsetting though.

some mothers embrace that responsibility

some shun it like the plague.

i, for one, would embrace the beauty that comes with this responsibility,

that being my children.

whatever it is, if you're a mom, one can tell.

so just like being a girlfriend means one can't kiss random guys unless with permission,

being a mother means even if you're a nymphomaniac, you don't gloat to the whole world about how you just love doggystyle or whatever.

i need to shutup and bathe before filming starts.

- xoxo
charis loves you
4:12 PM

Comments: Post a Comment

only yours baby

i'm charis vera Ng,
i'm NOT a Singaporean, i was born in UK
but i spent most of my four years in scotland
i love alastair(:
i'm doing my best to live for God though i often fail miserably

ok,try this:
you're this girl who's flown over to this country when you're no more than four years of age
you resent your dad for it,
and it doesn't help when things between your parents don't work out either.

so you miss your home terribly,
you miss going strawberry-picking,
you miss eating boiled eggs out of egg-cups
and you miss warm and cuddly Uncle John and Aunty Esther.

instead,
you find yourself forced to change
and adapt in a horribly hot place
where in primary school,
you meet cold,heartless little kids who ignore you and don't let you play "family"
just cos your accent is different.
early on,
you get weird looks and you find yourself going for recess breaks alone.
your classmates complain to the class teacher when you call them stupid
because they don't understand what to you is simple english.
but they leave you alone when you call them an imbecile
because they don't know what it means.
your primary 1 & 2 class teacher takes joy in complaining to your mummy
because she detests you.
she detests you for constantly correcting her english grammer and pronunciation in front of the class
you soon realize that you can actually gain and keep friends upon them finding out your mother's an actress
but by that time you've more or less forced yourself to lose your accent which makes communication a lot easier anyway.

that was the little girl charis,
now,
on top of that,
i can be a total biotch sometimes, towards people.
and don't tell me you aren't sometimes please.
but i try my very best not to bitch about people.
im a dangerous shopper(=
i never know what i want or need til i see it.

i don't like television.
now that's a first innit?HAH.
bet you never knew someone who didn't like tv
well i don't
and i'm not trying to be different and difficult
it's noisy and boring
i like music:)
i find eating a chore but i love snacking
figure that out
i find certain kinds of pain addictive,
no, i promise i'm still sane.

which is actually pretty remarkable for someone living here,
in this time and place
where you normally get loads of homework,
tests with questions that look like they're in foreign language,
and where everything's a competition to be the best,
the prettiest,
the most popular,
the most hated,
the thinnest,
the fattest, the coolest
the list goes on.
one shouldn't try to be something you're not,
but everyone knows that's easier said than done.
like duurh.