alone i was
before your love
when i saw you
i knew my life was touched

i saw your smile
and then i knew
that everything i felt
inside was true

i saw your smile
and then i knew
that i was gonna spend
my life with you


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Tuesday, September 26, 2006

i think we all do right?
need sleep

with exams coming around
and as bird puts it chiong here chiong there
sleepless nights
or rather,
i'd sleep early so i can wake up to burn the midnight oil
now doesn't that make sense?
aren't i smart?

but when it hits 3am and i actually want to sleep,
i can't because my brain is active
ugh

okay!
I IS NOW UPDATING

i've hardly studied(what's new)
i dont feel like going to school tomorrow(what's new)
i feel like sleeping in(what's new)

my aircon broke down
so then again,
i don't know if i really want to do that

Monkey, says:
you better go school ok

karys//- you still have my heart says:
i'm tirrreedddd
Monkey, says:
but youre still online

on the other hand,

alastair - time to say goodbye says:
i think im gona go bathe soon

karys//- you still have my heart says:
i should too

karys//- you still have my heart says:
i should sleep very soon

alastair - time to say goodbye says:
please go to school tmr

there's a difference
no alastair, it's not your fault and i'm not like annoyed or mad or anything


little drusilla's phone got taken today
she's the sweetest little darling

but everyone was strip-searched,
and who'd take drus' phone?
seeing her cry,
wouldn't you give it back?

this is the one thing making me think that
this time, maybe, just maybe,
it's not someone from our class

anyway
i should go wash the dishes before they grow a different breed of mould in the sink and have weird mould parties which will annoy me when i'm trying to study

notice me, please. that's all i'm asking from you

- xoxo
charis loves you
10:50 PM

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layout by chris. (:

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overheard in New York

peeeeektooores!(:

only yours baby

i'm charis vera Ng,
i'm NOT a Singaporean, i was born in UK
but i spent most of my four years in scotland
i love alastair(:
i'm doing my best to live for God though i often fail miserably

ok,try this:
you're this girl who's flown over to this country when you're no more than four years of age
you resent your dad for it,
and it doesn't help when things between your parents don't work out either.

so you miss your home terribly,
you miss going strawberry-picking,
you miss eating boiled eggs out of egg-cups
and you miss warm and cuddly Uncle John and Aunty Esther.

instead,
you find yourself forced to change
and adapt in a horribly hot place
where in primary school,
you meet cold,heartless little kids who ignore you and don't let you play "family"
just cos your accent is different.
early on,
you get weird looks and you find yourself going for recess breaks alone.
your classmates complain to the class teacher when you call them stupid
because they don't understand what to you is simple english.
but they leave you alone when you call them an imbecile
because they don't know what it means.
your primary 1 & 2 class teacher takes joy in complaining to your mummy
because she detests you.
she detests you for constantly correcting her english grammer and pronunciation in front of the class
you soon realize that you can actually gain and keep friends upon them finding out your mother's an actress
but by that time you've more or less forced yourself to lose your accent which makes communication a lot easier anyway.

that was the little girl charis,
now,
on top of that,
i can be a total biotch sometimes, towards people.
and don't tell me you aren't sometimes please.
but i try my very best not to bitch about people.
im a dangerous shopper(=
i never know what i want or need til i see it.

i don't like television.
now that's a first innit?HAH.
bet you never knew someone who didn't like tv
well i don't
and i'm not trying to be different and difficult
it's noisy and boring
i like music:)
i find eating a chore but i love snacking
figure that out
i find certain kinds of pain addictive,
no, i promise i'm still sane.

which is actually pretty remarkable for someone living here,
in this time and place
where you normally get loads of homework,
tests with questions that look like they're in foreign language,
and where everything's a competition to be the best,
the prettiest,
the most popular,
the most hated,
the thinnest,
the fattest, the coolest
the list goes on.
one shouldn't try to be something you're not,
but everyone knows that's easier said than done.
like duurh.