with |ove; me

Sunday, July 16, 2006

my cousin glenn is absolutely hilarious
i swear i almost cried laughing
haha

below, all from him on people's stupid ass bios/ profiles
ie; friendster profiles i think?

there are so many things that people put in their bios that are just plain stupid. Mostly I’m talking about the women, since I don’t spend a lot of time reading guy’s bios. But I’m sure guys are equally dumb too.

Take the following statement for example: “I love to laugh.” I swear, this is easily one of the dumbest things that people will say. Who doesn’t like to laugh? Is it even necessary to announce this to the world? What kind of response does a person think this statement deserves? Does anyone actually believe this is a deceptively profound thing to say? When someone tells me they love to laugh, I feel like stabbing them in the eye and asking if they find that funny.

“I like to have fun,” cousin to the first statement, is equally pointless. It’s like saying, “My eyes like to see things.” The whole point of FUN is that its LIKEABLE. If you are engaged in an activity that you don’t like, it’s NOT FUN. When someone says “I love to laugh and have fun”, I go out and cut babies.

“On weekends I like to go out, but sometimes I’ll just stay in” - Uhh…is this actually saying anything? Nearly everything a person does can follow the “Sometimes X, sometimes not X” formula. Sometimes I go to school, but sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I clip my toenails, sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I catch flying insects with my chopsticks, sometimes I don’t. One of the few things that a person can do all the time is breathe, and whoever writes stuff like this should try to stop.

he should write for the paper.
i love him(:

alastair just cracked me up like crazy by asking if i love bungna
why the hell does everyone including my boyfriend think i'm in love with bungna?
AIYOHH

- xoxo
charis loves you
12:15 AM

Comments: Post a Comment

only yours baby

i'm charis vera Ng,
i'm NOT a Singaporean, i was born in UK
but i spent most of my four years in scotland
i love alastair(:
i'm doing my best to live for God though i often fail miserably

ok,try this:
you're this girl who's flown over to this country when you're no more than four years of age
you resent your dad for it,
and it doesn't help when things between your parents don't work out either.

so you miss your home terribly,
you miss going strawberry-picking,
you miss eating boiled eggs out of egg-cups
and you miss warm and cuddly Uncle John and Aunty Esther.

instead,
you find yourself forced to change
and adapt in a horribly hot place
where in primary school,
you meet cold,heartless little kids who ignore you and don't let you play "family"
just cos your accent is different.
early on,
you get weird looks and you find yourself going for recess breaks alone.
your classmates complain to the class teacher when you call them stupid
because they don't understand what to you is simple english.
but they leave you alone when you call them an imbecile
because they don't know what it means.
your primary 1 & 2 class teacher takes joy in complaining to your mummy
because she detests you.
she detests you for constantly correcting her english grammer and pronunciation in front of the class
you soon realize that you can actually gain and keep friends upon them finding out your mother's an actress
but by that time you've more or less forced yourself to lose your accent which makes communication a lot easier anyway.

that was the little girl charis,
now,
on top of that,
i can be a total biotch sometimes, towards people.
and don't tell me you aren't sometimes please.
but i try my very best not to bitch about people.
im a dangerous shopper(=
i never know what i want or need til i see it.

i don't like television.
now that's a first innit?HAH.
bet you never knew someone who didn't like tv
well i don't
and i'm not trying to be different and difficult
it's noisy and boring
i like music:)
i find eating a chore but i love snacking
figure that out
i find certain kinds of pain addictive,
no, i promise i'm still sane.

which is actually pretty remarkable for someone living here,
in this time and place
where you normally get loads of homework,
tests with questions that look like they're in foreign language,
and where everything's a competition to be the best,
the prettiest,
the most popular,
the most hated,
the thinnest,
the fattest, the coolest
the list goes on.
one shouldn't try to be something you're not,
but everyone knows that's easier said than done.
like duurh.