alone i was
before your love
when i saw you
i knew my life was touched

i saw your smile
and then i knew
that everything i felt
inside was true

i saw your smile
and then i knew
that i was gonna spend
my life with you


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Thursday, December 29, 2005

i'm waiting for my school books to be delivered(:

dumdeedum

holidays are flying by too fast for me,
for once,
and i do honestly mean for once,
for the first time,
i didn't spend most of my holidays slacking around doing nothing at home(:
i was out a lot,
and i was happy
that's all that matters(:

well anyway,
strange as it might sound coming from charis vera ng,
i'm kinda excited to go back to school.
i'm dreading the end of holidays,
but i'm pretty excited to go back to school(:
reallyreally.

somehow,
the thought,
the feeling of starting fresh,
of being in a class of my own choice,
of doing something that i'm gonna love doing is absolutely,
thrillingly,
exciting(:

i know i won't be saying that when school starts but ah,
what the hell.

i got my uniform altered,
so i was actually planning on wearing it,
the one with the belt.
EXCEPT,
i tried it on yesterday and it's too short.
i mean,
way too short.

yesyes,
i know i hate rules and the shorter the skirt the better no?
but actually,
it's a bit too short for my liking.
it looks like some kinky schoolgirl on halloween outfit.

it's like,
kinky cute,
cute kinky.
whatever.
it's just a bit too short.
which really,
honestly,
sucks.

pffft.
so i was thinking maybe i'll just wear it for cca or something or when school isn't important.
but that doesn't sound all that great.
i'll probably attach extra cloth to it or something.
haha.

speaking of school,
i'm pretty psyched to be in the same class as my best friend and other people i'm pretty close to.
but as vicky says,
it's not that good to be in the same class as your close friends,
due to personality clash and ecetra ecetra.
but i realied something else worse than that.

victor once said,
familiarity breeds contempt.

i think that's what i'm most afraid of,
that because we're all cooped up in the same class and all that jazz,
we're gonna be so so tired of each other that we absolutely cannont stand hanging out and going out as friends anymore.
i honestly hope that doesn't happen.
i couldn't bear for that.

so anyway,
second last year in secondary school(:
two more years charis,
just two more years.

yeaa,
i'll miss it and all.
but i can't wait to be outta secondary school.
maybe by then i'll be heading off to the states or something.
i'd like to stay for my O's really,
doesn't make much difference but it's something to fall back on.
plus,
i'd love to study in the new school,
the about to be built school(:

everyone's said my batch is thee luckiest,
most fortunate batch.
and you know what?
i totally and utterly agree.

for one,
mine was the first batch which could choose secondary schools AFTER finding out your PSLE results

number 2:
my batch got to stay and study in the old school, the temporary school and we're gonna get to stay and study in the new school for a year and take our O's there. whereas the girls a year above us will probably only take their O's in the new school,
if even that.

number 3:
Mrs Lee says once in a pl-lites four years,they should be able to participate in the school Musical of which we are all so proud of.
but like last years sec4s were encouraged not to due to O levels and everything.
well i don't know if they were discouraged from it, i just know that there was only one sec4 in our midst cos she was one who was okay with coping with the musical as well as her O's.
well anyway, my batch got a chance to participate in The Father's Hand last year and if we get stayed back a year, we might get a chance to participate again.
haha.

i think there's a bit more.
the only thing i don't like about my batch as well as the batch above us is that starting from the year above us,
all belts are sewn on.
and that sucks period.

okay,
enough about school(:
stupid books still havn't arrived yet.
pffft.

can't wait for tonight(:
yayness

with the coming of a new year

ohohoh.
i dreamt about vicky, bella and justin last night.
weird eh?
and and,
what else did i dream about?
i don't know,
i just know it was messed up and weird.
haha.

i love the new song(:

- xoxo
charis loves you
1:45 PM

credits

layout by chris. (:

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overheard in New York

peeeeektooores!(:

only yours baby

i'm charis vera Ng,
i'm NOT a Singaporean, i was born in UK
but i spent most of my four years in scotland
i love alastair(:
i'm doing my best to live for God though i often fail miserably

ok,try this:
you're this girl who's flown over to this country when you're no more than four years of age
you resent your dad for it,
and it doesn't help when things between your parents don't work out either.

so you miss your home terribly,
you miss going strawberry-picking,
you miss eating boiled eggs out of egg-cups
and you miss warm and cuddly Uncle John and Aunty Esther.

instead,
you find yourself forced to change
and adapt in a horribly hot place
where in primary school,
you meet cold,heartless little kids who ignore you and don't let you play "family"
just cos your accent is different.
early on,
you get weird looks and you find yourself going for recess breaks alone.
your classmates complain to the class teacher when you call them stupid
because they don't understand what to you is simple english.
but they leave you alone when you call them an imbecile
because they don't know what it means.
your primary 1 & 2 class teacher takes joy in complaining to your mummy
because she detests you.
she detests you for constantly correcting her english grammer and pronunciation in front of the class
you soon realize that you can actually gain and keep friends upon them finding out your mother's an actress
but by that time you've more or less forced yourself to lose your accent which makes communication a lot easier anyway.

that was the little girl charis,
now,
on top of that,
i can be a total biotch sometimes, towards people.
and don't tell me you aren't sometimes please.
but i try my very best not to bitch about people.
im a dangerous shopper(=
i never know what i want or need til i see it.

i don't like television.
now that's a first innit?HAH.
bet you never knew someone who didn't like tv
well i don't
and i'm not trying to be different and difficult
it's noisy and boring
i like music:)
i find eating a chore but i love snacking
figure that out
i find certain kinds of pain addictive,
no, i promise i'm still sane.

which is actually pretty remarkable for someone living here,
in this time and place
where you normally get loads of homework,
tests with questions that look like they're in foreign language,
and where everything's a competition to be the best,
the prettiest,
the most popular,
the most hated,
the thinnest,
the fattest, the coolest
the list goes on.
one shouldn't try to be something you're not,
but everyone knows that's easier said than done.
like duurh.